On a Boat

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A lost soul is on a boat sailing on the clouds of dreams. There are winds trying to make me lose my path and faith in the bright future. I know we are born to suffer and struggle in life but how to reach the correct destination?! The sea is rough and the winds are turning into storms and I fear falling off my boat. I keep wondering if this is a river? An ocean? Or a mere sea? I can see wonderful trees and shine at the river side; so is it a river? I can’t see clearly; so is it a sea? It is too perfect to be a river or a sea it is a huge, pure and awesome ocean but it is so deep that I fear sinking in it. “Why do you fear sinking?” asked the boat; “it is the first time I am sailing in a boat and I don’t know how to swim or what to do or how to act,” said me.

 

   The cloud is sad I feared it for it is my dreams that I have been dreaming of my whole life. But I am sorry my dear beautiful cloud, I don’t fear you, I fear the storm. This storm is not inside me but outside, my cloud, so whenever the storm blows, I shiver of cold and seek shelter. I have no blanket, I just need a hug. Perhaps not only a physical hug but a heart and a soul that I can deeply connect with and identify with. And I identify myself with you, my cloud; I just wish the storm vanishes.   

 

     This storm can take a form of whispers rather than mere air. Whispers are paralyzing the mind and frightening  the heart. These whispers are of a value and you, my cloud, you are my future. I am wondering what to do or where to go?! I will keep resisting the storms as much as I can, till one day, my cloud, I will reach my destination that I am sure will be a heaven on earth. I have faith in Allah first, my cloud and my ocean. This storm won’t kill me but indeed it will make me stronger. But I beg you, storm, be gentle, I am a human.

 I think of death as a plan B if my first struggle against the storm  failed. What is the importance of a boat without an ocean that I can sail in? Without an ocean and a boat I will fell of my cloud and die. I believe I will jump into my ocean If you become a destructive storm. I will reach my destination by swimming. I know I cannot swim but I will try for you and struggle for you. If I could not swim for you, I am ready to die into you. So, be gentle on me when I jump into you, my ocean; and whenever I am about to die, give me some of your love so I can survive. And if you let me die, I am happy to die in your bottom, my ocean.

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